How do you say....?
When I was a younger, less self assured debutante...
While I was being fitted for a dress for the Miss Illinois pageant, the seamstress held up her special measuring tape and through a mouthful of pins exclaimed "my you have incredible girth!" After the time that my mother told me I was "growing in both directions" at a Cinn-a-bon store in the Springfield Mall, this is the most horrified I've ever been at my size.
The owner of the store quickly stepped in to assure me that in the dress fitting business, girth refered to the distance measured from the center of your collar bones, down your torso, through your legs, and back up to the center of your shoulders. I'm not sure if this was in truth, or perhaps a cover up for the honesty of the seamstress? At any rate, it seems a little bit dirty and I think that girth might be a misnomer for something better referred to as length.
While reading through the records of my medical exam recently, I came across this other unusual phrasing: "Appropriate gait for age. Proximal and distal strength in the upper and lower extremities is grossly intact."
Perhaps I'll let the seamstress know that, when talking to tall strong people, she can tell them that their girth is incredible and their strength is grossly intact.
While I was being fitted for a dress for the Miss Illinois pageant, the seamstress held up her special measuring tape and through a mouthful of pins exclaimed "my you have incredible girth!" After the time that my mother told me I was "growing in both directions" at a Cinn-a-bon store in the Springfield Mall, this is the most horrified I've ever been at my size.
The owner of the store quickly stepped in to assure me that in the dress fitting business, girth refered to the distance measured from the center of your collar bones, down your torso, through your legs, and back up to the center of your shoulders. I'm not sure if this was in truth, or perhaps a cover up for the honesty of the seamstress? At any rate, it seems a little bit dirty and I think that girth might be a misnomer for something better referred to as length.
While reading through the records of my medical exam recently, I came across this other unusual phrasing: "Appropriate gait for age. Proximal and distal strength in the upper and lower extremities is grossly intact."
Perhaps I'll let the seamstress know that, when talking to tall strong people, she can tell them that their girth is incredible and their strength is grossly intact.
Well... your fairy godmother, for one, think you are just right and beautiful inside and out! (It must be all the green beans...even with the butter!)
ReplyDeleteHilarious, Carrie.
ReplyDelete